Tom N Toms' Opening At Mabolo Cebu and The Problem Of Loneliness

Dear Cebuanos:

How are you? Welcome to Bisaya Short Films, where you can learn things like, how to be happy by watching cinema, such as movies of Dolphy and Lav Diaz. After reading, you will learn two things:

1. How Tom N Toms can help us Cebuanos be more compassionate and less hurtful to those who are different.

2. How you can help fellow Cebuanos become less sad and less depressed, especially after the news about bombing in Davao.

Let's start.

The other day we the Bloggers got invited for the launch of the Tom N Toms Coffee Shop at The Greenery in Mabolo, the one near Gallery, where Boosog restaurant is. Type "Tom N Toms Mabolo" on Google to locate the place. 

I liked the location of Tom N Toms because it's not in a mall, and I think I read from Jessica Zafra's reputable blog and Nicholson Taleb's books that congested malls can be harmful to society. 

It's encouraged not to spend too much time in malls. We have to diversify. We should spread out our time in different places, as Taleb's book suggested, for the benefit of our antifragile bodies. Click HERE to read more of his ideas. 

Thinking small is good because large things cause bigger damage. Duterte's federalism is based on this idea. Making homes and regions operate in a small scale lessens large-scale casualties and damages. 

Tom N Toms location seems inspired by this. It's away from the mall and provides competition for them, and we know that competition is good for the consumers as a whole. The more competition, the better the product. Tom N Toms gets this and they have my respect. And gratitude for letting us try their concoctions and drinks on the house. 

Also, their espresso is reliable for that needed caffeine fix, and I recommend you try their Strawberry Smoothie without cream and sugar because it can be the healthiest option to get there. Tom N Toms is also 24/7 all week; convenient for writers and students. (McDonald's Basak says they're 24/7 but on Sundays, they're closed)

Now how can Tom N Toms help us Cebuanos become more compassionate? By providing a venue for Cebuanos to talk. By providing another location for us to learn how we should try our hard to not say mean things to people because, just to err on the safe side, those people we say mean things to might be mentally unhealthy or depressed. Suicide is a number one cause of death.

Here are more ideas about this:

1. Go to Tom N Toms on a weekday. Everyone might be in crowded coffee shops in malls where seats are not guaranteed, but not you. You're comfortable. Now that you are, you can now read the ideas of David Foster Wallace while sipping a Tom N Toms latte to learn how to not say mean stuff to people who might cry and hurt themselves because of your words. Here's a sample of his ideas. Click HERE for more.

2. Go to Tom N Toms and click HERE to read the article from the reliable The Guardian entitled "Think loneliness is about single people looking for love? Think again" . It's about an elderly married couple in Italy that policemen visited because they were crying out loud from loneliness. Here's a sample:

the story of Jole and Michele suggests something else: a distinct kind of loneliness stemming not from the absence of significant others but from a feeling of disconnection with the wider world, a sense that you’re no longer part of something shared and human.

Visit Tom N Toms to nurture friendship, get healthier drinks, read ideas from David Foster Wallace and learn more of compassion.  A person's life might depend on how you hurt with your words.

To see what's inside Tom N Toms, click HERE.

Nagmahal nasaktan nagsulat sa Tom N Toms,
A Bad Richard


5 Solutions Problematic Bloggers Can Get From Watching Bo Burnham's Comedy Show "what."

Problem: You're a blogger who feeds on an audience. Not actual feeding, because that's cannibalism and is illegal in the Philippines. I think.

But you feed on an audience in that you want them to want you. Part of you needs them. Part of you hates them for needing them. And then part of you use them. You feel guilty because you might be wasting people's time with your ideas or you might be actually harming them with the ideas you think are helping them. 

You feel guilty because there's just so much consumer stuff in the Philippines, in Cebu City in particular, and every street in Colon has a billboard and flyer that appears to tell you that your sadness can be cured by just shopping or throwing away your money or eating your guts out until you get Diabetes in a resto that offers Unlimited Rice. And you feel guilty because your business is selling Chicken with Unlimited Rice.

You feel guilty because you're a vegan and you're scared of being a hypocrite, even if the idea of a "hypocrite" is being sold to you by people who make money from making people think they're hypocrites. "Being Perceived As Honest" is a commodity you buy, like a yogurt drink.

You feel guilty because no matter how much you try to tell people how to live their lives by being decent or by not cheating on their partners or by not using marijuana, you know that deep down there's actually no one concrete answer that can prove that cheating on someone is wrong.

You're horrified by the idea that there's no real right and wrong, and the law can just be ignored at a cost you can just circumvent if you know how to, and still you feel like you must do something.

You feel guilty because while you make tons of money with your blog's advertising tricks, you don't know the cost of your ideas.

Maybe somebody read your blog post the wrong way and now they're out there abusing people's rights because of your suggestion? Maybe the poverty situation is there because you advertise too much in your blog? Maybe the reason the internet is so slow and hurting people's feelings is because you upload high-quality videos and crisp photos of travels no one but you cares about?

You feel guilty because you review movies and you still download illegally.

You feel guilty because you complain against everyone who is not you and living not the way you want them to, and yet you still download movies illegally, and stealing from people's intellectual property.

You feel guilty because you write about food and shopping and books and commercialism and then there's an abominable flood situation in Cebu and part of it could come from the plastic bag trash in malls resulting from the absurd level of online advertising from which you're blog thrives. 

What do you do to not feel guilty?

Solutions: Digest Bo Burnham's Comedy

1. To reframe your guilt, maybe you can listen to Bo Burnham's jokes in his famous show above? Then think for probably two days about his ideas in the said video about:
  • The effect on your mental well-being of having always an audience to make you feel valued in such a way that you derive ultimate worth from external conditions
  • The effect of uploading so much "Videos and Pictures That Are Important" online in wasting electricity and internet bandwidth that might be causing our government and businesses' money that could've been spent on making sure Colon doesn't flood as much.
  • The effect of your blog posts in making big businesses richer and destroying opportunities for smaller businesses who can't afford advertising
  • The effect of your blog ideas and social media uploads in how much greed and envy you're generating from Cebuanos, causing them to drink and use marijuana more because they felt bed about not living the life you tried to show in your blog posts, even if you don't intend them to be jealous
  • The effect of your blog posts to the promotion of High-Cholesterol and Other Unhealthy Dishes that leads to Cebuanos having unhealthier diet, costing money from the taxpayers because when these Cebuanos go to government hospitals after eating too much Crispy Pata from the a restaurant you're blog is promoting, it's immediately the government's problem, right? 

2. Go to Bo Burnham's website by clicking HERE. And then go to the part of his website that shows his favorites, and you can watch there a video interview of David Foster Wallace reminding us how the business of entertainment and "Me First!" attitude might be the reason we have so many important people in our lives killing themselves.

3. Know how to not feel guilty by reading Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now because the book proved to me that in the right mindset configured mathematically in the book, I seem to be able to detach myself from the feeling of guilt and self-hatred that comes from a narcissistic, self-obsessed attachment to pain, which is a form of insanity, and something that I can escape from. Pain attachment and being imprisoned by the idea that "One Has To Feel Pleasure Every Time And Sacrifice Is For Religious People And I'm An Atheist And Reason Is King Even If I Know That The Reason I'm So Proud About Is Just As Religious As Religion If We Follow Albert Camus' Reasoning" is optional, and the book helped me be reminded with that, and now I've never been happier.

4. Quit blogging, Seriously. There's a book from Nicholson Taleb called Anti-fragility and one good story there is the Hydra Myth where a Hydra's head multiplies after you decapitate one, which means the Hydra increases a value after his head got hurt. I'm not saying you're a Hydra but if your blog is your head, and you cut it off, your happiness might increase. 

5. Go to jessicarulestheuniverse.com and then on the lower left is a Hotline Number that connects you to a Professional Listener who promises to help you in times of despair and existential crisis. Call the number now.

6. Forget everything that I said here and live your own.

Yours Truly,
A Bad Richard


Duterte to grace Cebu #Call4Change Thanksgiving Party on June 25

President-elect Rodrigo Duterte will grace the thanksgiving celebration organized by the #Call4Change group, which campaigned for him in the last elections, on June 25 at the Sugbo South Coastal Properties (SRP).

Dubbed “One Love, One Nation”, the thanksgiving celebration will kick off at 4PM in the evening with various song, dance, and other performances by local and Manila-based artists. The event is expected to end at around 10PM in the evening.

“Minus any unforeseen circumstances that may hamper his planned visit, incoming president Duterte has already confirmed that he will come to personally express his gratitude to all Cebuanos who delivered a big win for Duterte last May,” said #Call4Change Organizing Team member Atty. Chris Ruiz.

Duterte won an overwhelming victory in Cebu during the May 9 polls with exactly 1,022,805 votes in Cebu — 296,246 in Cebu City alone and 726,559 votes in the province.

#CAll4Change is an alliance of parallel groups that campaigned for the victory of President-elect Duterte in Cebu. It was initiated by the Duterte Campaign Team under National Campaign Manager Jun Evasco.

Doris Mongaya, Duterte Campaign Team Visayas media coordinator and member of the “One Love, One Nation” Cebu organizing team, said the party is anticipated to draw thousands of supporters and is open to everyone who in one way or another helped the Duterte campaign.

The event will be hosted by Arnel Ignacio, Bryan Cabase, Kat de Castro, Keanna Reeves and will include the performances of Dulce, Max Surban, Tres Marias, Saicy A. and Wowee Dancers,Fifth Solomon, Sam Costanilla, Power Trio, Mariano Dandie Dimataga, Bae Alert, LGBT Advocates,Selena Sevilla, RJ Curaza Dagapioso, Angelica Ninniel Marabe Bejic, Da Beatz, Game Over, G4M, Jon Vistal, Cebu Lawyers Band, Lumen is Burning Corpses, AC/W, Upgrade, Troi Jet, Synergy, The Voice Kids Paul Abellana, Dark April, Chifracr & Mischief, Cals Sisters, and the Mandaue Youth 4 Change.

There will be a Halad Pasalamat at the Plaza Independencia before the party from 9AM to 2PM which includes free medical and dental check up, legal consultation and notarization, pampering services such as haircut and foot massage, and motorcycle tune-up.

These services will be conducted in partnership with the Philippine Statistics Authority, Department of Agriculture, Land Transportation Office, Philippine Postal Corporation, GSIS, Department of Foreign Affairs, City Government's Department of Veterinary Medicine and Fisheries,
Presidential Commission for the Urban Poor, Philhealth, Philippine Information Agency, Socialized Security System, and Pilipinas Guardians International Inc. and Health Inc. Outpatient Services.


A Letter To Mother Earth From People Who Attempt To Care

Dear Mother Earth:
The Earth Day Celebration in U.P. last April 2016 called Sagana: Kilos Para Kay Inang Kalikasan was our humble attempt to figure out ways we could amend the damage the entire Filipino civilization caused upon you.

We understand the absurdity of this effort because some of us still couldn't reconcile the fact that those who harm you don't consider what they're doing as harm, but just a way to assert their right to enjoy your blessings and to enjoy their God-given right to own two houses, own cars, own properties and extract from the environment the goods they deserve.

The great challenge of any Earth Day event is to let people know that a need is different from a want. People rationalize their wants, and when they harm the environment, they feel not one bit of remorse because they consider their harm as a consequence of asserting the satisfaction of their needs. How can we make people realize that cutting trees to be used to make their beautiful furniture is not a need? 

And how can our new President-Elect Duterte help us forward this cause when he's being labelled as a Person Who Wants To Rape A Woman, and women and nature are one? How can we be not hypocritical in our efforts to help you? How can we not be harming your environment and still enjoy your blessing? How can we not be cruel to animals and plants when we are dependent on their vitamins and minerals and we have to kill some animals for our nutrition? These are the questions that UP Cebu and Gender Development talked about in the event, and they dedicate it all to you.

Anyway, the UP Cebu Gender and Development (GAD) Office last Earth Day 2016 Celebration used the theme "SAGANA: Kilos Para Kay Inang Kalikasan!" for their event at the University of the Philippines Cebu Lobby Conference Hall and Oblation Square respectively. UP Cebu GAD's advocacy was for you, Mother Earth. Everyone can learn more about their advocacy in their Facebook Page.

UP Cebu GAD joins the whole global community in giving reverence to our green and blue planet, Mother Earth in celebrating Earth Day 2016. The UP Cebu GAD theme for the Earth Day 2016 is "SAGANA: Kilos Para Kay Inang Kalikasan!" This celebration is affiliated with Earth Day Network, Ananda Marga PROUT Initiatives for Asia and the Pacific, Planet Vegis Cebu and the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty Against Animals and Plants.

That said, here's a video curated by Bisaya Short Films that can remind people how not to cause environment its ruin. Hit Play Button to view:

People Who Attempt To Care


Letter For The Friend of Film Writer Jessica Zafra About Game of Thrones

Dear Friend of Jessica Zafra Who Needs Explanation of Game of Thrones:

Bisaya Short Films presents The Iron Throne
Made of Toys
Hi, how are you doing? What are you like? I mean, what books, TV, movies, films or Youtube Channels do you consume? I don't like using the word consume, but I can't think of a better word without googling a synonym, which I refuse to do because I want to make this explanation as much straight from out of my head as I can, not overthinking it, just trying to make you feel the entire Feels I have for the Game of Thrones experience. 

Anyway, back to business: the explanation comes in three parts, Before Game of Thrones, During Game of Thrones and After Game of Thrones. Before is the context, so you can see how a non-fantasy-story fan like me finds creative and entertainment value and satisfaction from the show knowing that there seems to be this heuristics where if a TV series is about dragons and battles and swords, I put it at the bottom of my Hierarchy of Shows To Watch because only The Higher Order of Nerddom can access its value.  This context is also helpful in that if you liked the shows I listed here, enjoying GoT and finding worth in my explanation is more probable.  

During is my attempt at making you feel The Feels about how I've been feeling and thinking about the show during Staring At The Ceiling Moments, and trying to tell you how less of life's pleasure have you been missing. After is the anticlimactic ending the way Sopranos' ended. But before we start,  here are photo art I made arguaably influenced by my Game of Thrones experience.

Title: Daenarys of House Targaryen
Title: Children of The Starks

Title: Feeding The Dragons 

Before Game of Thrones:

1. Dear Self: David Foster Wallace warns against T.V. because it makes us lonely and spreads more self-loathing that leads one to take to suicide and makes one so stingy of an ironist that s/he couldn't tell just what truth is anymore, so watch less of it.

2. Some Stuff That Made Life Worth Taking My Anti-Depressants For: The Wire. Breaking Bad. James Salter's prose in Last Night. Salinger's novels. All of Paul Thomas and Wes Anderson, Whit Stillman, Coen Brothers, Arrested Development, Noah Baumbach, Anna Kendrick, Carey Mulligan, Monica Belluci, Tina Fey, Louis C.K., Vice Ganda, Wenn Deramas' humor, The Oatmeal, Ellen Adarna, Will Ferrell, Cat Videos, Holy Motors, and Jerrold Tarrog's power in Sana Dati.

3. Detested: Suits, both the TV show and the corporate attire. Also, House of Cards  because Zoey Barnes The Blogger Who Writes Articles On Her Cellphone Like Me was killed by the show. 

During Game of Thrones:

1. Game of Thrones is a story of raped, loved, cold, beheaded, abandoned, cursed, sold, saved, pillaged, rescued, burnt, sick, stabbed, eaten, resurrected, flung, fornicated, religious, anonymous, incestuous, found, worshiped, lost, castrated, and bludgeoned people fighting for what they think is right and/or due them. 

It also presents everything I deem important in what I think is my real world, and shot in stupendous "Peter Jackson's Lord of The Rings" battle geography and choreography whose frisson of thrills mimics Amazing Race's and whose relevance is too powerful to not make me want to write a PoliSci thesis, if only because the kingdoms are to Game of Thrones what nation-states are to Earth. To wit,

  • High Sparrow's rise is communism's (Albert Camus' The Rebel said communist revolt is religious).
  • GoT's Targaryen's claim is the Palestine's Promised Land conflict. 

  • Dragons and Melisendre's dark arts are Nicholson Taleb's "Black Swan" uncertainties and Stephen Hawking's Black Holes that makes everything I can think of probable/possible.

  • White Walkers is Climate Change that will wipe us all if we the humanity doesn't stop fighting against ourselves instead of the common enemy which in Game of Thrones is The Winter and The White Walkers and which in Independence Day are aliens.

  • Wildlings' power is Filipino squatters' voting power this Monday. 
  • Arya's abnegation as assassin is Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now arming the enlightened citizens with the weapon of ego-detachment that's used to fight the oppression of consumerism. 
  • Most importantly: futility of the throne is Albert Camus' absurdism that makes one want to not die even if one is doomed to.

2. Comment of Aldub-loving Non-Reader Friend Whom Woody Allen Might Call A Philistine But Holden Caulfield Would Never Have Labelled as Phony:

" ano ba yan, nakakainip, ang hanging, gusto ko panoorin lahat ang season 6 in one sitting! Nakakaadik!" ( I want to watch everything in one sitting! )

I am to this friend what Left Cat is to Right Cat above and what Abby is to Ilyana in Broad City.

3. Put in Resumè: I'm a student of the Academy of Television Education, Major in Game of Thrones, Minor in Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt and Broad City.

After Game of Thrones:

1. Ahhhhhhhhhh even ang angle ng camera, which is bird's eye view at pa zoom out at sudden "dilat mata" effect, then cut to black and then credits: na predict ko!

2. Watching GOT made me see futures/pasts!

3. I have become Bran.

Title: A Cat Acting Out GoT's
"I'm Not Drowning. I'm Home" Scene


Bisaya Short Films and Globe Media Excellence Awards And Everything Else About Hypocrisy

Dear Internet Writers of The Philippines: 

The Globe Media Excellence Awards Jury is now looking for entries from which they will declare their 2016 Batch of Winners, and you should submit an entry because the Internet needs you and the more entries you send, the more powerful our Facebook accounts become.

More power for our Facebook and social media might mean a more transparent and decentralized and anti-fragile Philippines, which could then mean less traffic in Mandaue, less cases of mentally disturbed girlfriends/boyfriends that ruin Filipinos' lives, and less number of children in the streets who are being fed by random strangers with leftover junk food and Carcinogen-1-laden Fastfood Burgers that all the more add to these children's problems, instead of alleviating them. Also, speaking of meanings, Albert Camus said Life Is Better Without Meaning, so let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Also, remember the Millenium Development Goals set by the United Nations to improve the well-being of every single poor person on Earth? Judges of the entries for the Global Media Excellence Awards 2016 requires submissions to fit such goals.

Here is my only tip for Online Writers on how to write your GMEA entries to increase your "chances of winning": don't be dead. Dead people don't get to win, unless you're Heath Ledger or something. Just kidding. Here are some tips:

1. Don't skip reading Eckhart Tolle's The Power of Now. The book fixes the common Egoistic Problem in Advocacy Work: using Charity Work to feed one's ego, to feed one's need to be noticed by their friends as A Person Who Saves The World And Who Is Better Than/Like Mother Teresa.

The book tackles how you can free your ego, detach from the mind's double-binds, remove your obsession with suffering, and confront the absurd and yet necessary mindset of living the most healthy life even if we're all condemned to die. Hurray for Existentialism!

By the way, do you notice how people love their suffering, and how this kind of insanity is what gets us quicker to the End of The World? Not that The End of The World is something we despise. It is what it is. No labels, no judgment. But by saying No Judgment, we are still judging it. If you're still confused by such absurdity and you can't live with such contradiction and you're the kind of fragile person who goes crazy at the sudden change of a friend's dinner plan, then do not submit an entry for the Globe Media Excellence Awards 2016 unless you consult with a mental therapist first because anything you do that you consider is A Help For Humanity will end up toxic.

Helping others (by volunteering, by organizing events with the goal of raising money for poor people, by starting a family, by loving someone) without fixing yourself first is just you feeding your ego, and thereby is a path to more self-destruction.

Self-destruction may have sprung from The Dark Matter like Black Holes, and thereby must have a reason to exist. But we already have Death as The Dark Matter, so must we also let The Dark engulf The Light of Life? Whatever happened to Yin and Yang? Anyway, get healthy first by making sure:

-you're eating a healthy diet (but how do we know what is healthy when the Media lie to us all the time?)
-you're not hurting your love partners with your Parental Abandonment Issues (but if I'm free of my suffering, who am I now if I Am My Suffering? Btw, Eckhart Tolle's Power of Now has the answers that DO NOT INVOLVE THEOLOGY AND "GO Back To God" Solutions that your Bullsh*t Radar considers worthless)

-you get therapy via Church Priests (but be careful, though, some priests are unenlightened enough to hurt you or "molest children", if we based it on the Oscar Best Picture, Spotlight; via Psychologists; or via what Nicholson Taleb calls The Via Negativa Approach, where you subtract things from your life in order to be better. Subtractive living means cutting off from white sugar, from Carcinogen1-laced ham, by removing off marijuana unless it's medically subscribed or if you live where the Dangerous Drugs Act board is not enforced, cut down on Treadmilling, where you work so hard just because you fortify your social status of owning properties, which seems to be good for now but the iatrogenics of that is that later you might be so attached with your wealth, that there's more harm in the feeling that you might lose them all compared to not having wealth to worry about in the first place.

Also, don't be a wiseass by saying, "but everything has carcinogens! Let's just do YOLO and die!" In response to that: "Go back to the gene pool if all you do is to smartass your way out of life. You have no place for my Earth.", said Not Me.

2. After reading the book, the assumption is that you can anchor your drive to Help Others not from the ego, but from an inner peace that is reminiscent of the Zen Teachings of D.T. Suzuki, an enlightenment teacher mentioned in J.D. Salinger's Franny and Zooey, which is a book you will read when you want to be reminded of this truth:

If you have no interest to Google Search who J.D. Salinger is, please move to another blog. Bisaya Short Films is not for you.

3. Don't miss watching David Foster Wallace's Brief Interviews With Hideous Men to learn that People Who Repeat What They Say Do That Because It Is Only Through Redundancy That Evolution Works, if we based this on That Brainpickings Article; and to fix the ironic issues inherent in helping others, the double bind being this:

"If I don't help others, I am selfish. If I don't, I am selfish, too, because I derive my happiness from other people's malaise."

4. Quit smoking, stop drinking alcohol, stop having sex for non-Love pleasure even with condom because Condoms offers no complete protection, stop drinking soda, don't buy a car unless it's a matter of life and death or unless you're planning to use the car for Carpool, leave your drug-using partner unless it's prescription drugs. Or not. Natural Selection will do these for you, anyway.


Taong Grasa sa Dan's Message To TV Patrol's Pinky Webb and "Honor The National Anthem"'s Sam Costanilla

To Sam:

1. I agree. People should always know that there's only one way of showing respect to the National Anthem sung after movie screenings. Only one, and this should be final, like The Ampatuans' decision to kill people they don't dig (Oh The Pun!) And we don't care if you had diarrhea in the movie after all the Bibingka and Ginabot you ate because you read an article from Sun.Star that Ginabot is a must-try. No. Even if you're exploding with Diarrhea, you should always stand up to hum to the song. You have to sing and shit, even after all the diarrhea the movie seat absorbs.

2. People should know that it's important to be pretentious and to let other people see and know how you respect the country by singing a song that means nothing to you. It doesn't matter if you have a different definition of respect: there's only one definition of everything. BOTO is vagina, and it is impossible to say that BOTO is just an acronym for Buy One Take One. This is democracy, and by democracy, I mean you do what I say and you can't believe in anything I don't.

3. If you do not have feet or you are a paraplegic or if you are too depressed to stand up and too tired to explain everything, you are a disrespectful person and you should be condemned because you show no pride to your country. The government doesn't care about your being paraplegic; you need to stand up to sing the National anthem. Although it must be said, too, that the government doesn't care either way ha ha.

To Pinky Webb:
1. You did an extremely good job reporting about The Filipinas word usage issue in TV Patrol. That was like three minutes, right? That was clearly not a waste of time because obviously people of our generation care for proper use of words. I mean, just scan through comments on Facebook like: "wer u" "lolz" and "There should be biter use for this.". IKR?

But I'm sorry, you're wrong; there's no such thing as correct grammar. By the way, you could've spent your 3 minutes reading that beautiful piece in the hyperlink than reporting on Filipinas, a topic which only the positively intelligent Atinio (pronounced Ateneo, but different from the School) and LUSOlle (same same) pedophile priests (No I don't mean them. I mean the other them.)who cash in on people's ignorance.


Stuff Game Shows Like Showtime And Wowowillie Are Too Weak To Say

1. Don't recite your poetry, no matter how sentimental they are. Yes, you've remembered that piece of poem, good job memory you attributed to God, but we've got to go because our profit is dependent on how entertaining you are and you are not fun to listen to if you're reciting that boring dialogue. Grind! We don't care about how that poem means so much to you, how that was written by your husband before he died in a bloody combat with your father, how that was a product of suffered love and life. We don't care. We need to go. So unless you make us feel awesome, just shut the eff up.

2. We will give you money but, uhm, can you, like, be on TV and share how you are a victim of rape and how you made it through thanks to GOD what are you doing! That's against religion!

3. We give you money, but we need to take advantage of your pain and past, and you should make us money, too. We say we care but only so much that it gives us the estimated ROI Statistics-1001- R.E > Tax E.D. Profit. We make money out of you, poor people.

4. We tell the Madlang People that they raise their hands and in Jesus' name, and shout "In Jesus Name, We'll Heal You, Sick Participant!". Yes, we do that. Jesus' healing powers is pretty much dependent on how many people raise their hands and pray for me. Jesus is that shallow.


The Bisaya Art You Need To Support: The February 2013 Joya Art Exhibit at SM City Cebu Art Gallery

Is this ART/TRASH? Or TRASH pretending to be ART? Or ART pretending to be TRASH? 
 Or TRASH pretending to be TRASH?
“I'm tired of my life, my clothes, the things I say. I'm hacking away at the surface, as at some kind of gray ice, trying to break through to what is underneath or I am dead. I can feel the surface trembling—it seems ready to give but it never does. I am uninterested in current events. How can I justify this? How can I explain it? I don't want to have the same vocabulary I've always had. I want something richer, broader, more penetrating and powerful.”
James Salter, Memorable Days: The Selected Letters of James Salter and Robert Phelps


Dead Cat, Kafka On The Shore and The White Ribbon

Even if I almost immediately stared away from it I knew the cat was dead because its innards were gushed out of its body in a dried so-burnt-it-was-white kind of way. I also knew I had to look away from it because I keep photos of cats with funny captions from Cheezburger Network on my phone. My phone has actually no cellular connection so other than its look it really has nothing to do with being the usual communication gadget most people who didn't get the chance to learn the conflict mineral issue in Congo, have. The Congo issue basically says your cellphone parts are most likely mined and produced by raped little girls.

The dead cat reminded me of Haruki Murakami's Kafka On The Shore. Although the dead cat I saw was in certain degrees supposed to be more haunting because not only is no one certain who is most likely to blame for the cat's death, people around the lying cat on the road can't also seem to be bothered to even get it away from the streets so it won't be ran over again. For the third time. Or even none, since who is to say the cat wasn't hammered to blotches by a group of Cebuano twelve-year-olds who took literally Michael Haneke's White Ribbon?


A Good Year

I was in the kind of coffee shop where the barista tries to up your order of Tall Mocha Latte and you realize there's not that much reason to say No, so you spend extra 10 bucks for something you knew right away you'd feel bad about later.

And then I started to read. Then thought about Marion Cotillard's substituted line in A Good Year, the movie being screened in this cafe's free TV. Then I realized how wrong I was in railing against this movie. Who would've thought this movie could be this brilliant if we didn't let all the actors talk and just stream running images of Russell Crowe and Marion Cotillard?

Then of course I had to watch these ladies in front of me lay-out a photo album. It's partly a scrapbook, because they're using green paper-cut-outs shaped into those kind of round flowers you make as a kid. Those flower shapes that never seem to capture any real flower's shape, if you think about it.

Then I was now watching the barista watch these ladies finish their scrapbook. And then I hear her tell the lady customers, "Wow! That's really good. "

Whatever happened to conflict of interest, I'm happy.


The Status of Minor Cebuano Addicts

The other night there was a theatre show in celebration for town fiesta a few blocks away from where I was sitting, which might as well be a celebration of everyday, considering it's easier to count the days we're not celebrating one than the opposite. It was presented as mainly about a guy who was doing drugs and felt like a big failure at the end. Then he supposedly realized he was wrong and should've followed his parents' advice.

Now I don't know about you, but if trying to solve this problem is now just being dismissed as to be this simple, I'd have every crap I own ebay-ed pronto so I can totally start shoveling all those druggy cooly thingies down my dried N-methylamphetamin-virgin throat. For if this is now how everyone generally seems to don't give a quack about the day to day insanity-driving struggle to prevent and cope with having a drug-committed kid and the people most likely to be doing drugs are certainly not the most adaptable and cared for among the lot as it is, then you would be crazy not to think you might as well just be doing the thing, right? Unlike the other, at least drugging still might have some remotely even almost impossible chance of height worthy to still look forward to in such circumstances.

Cebuanos, think it through. Or you might end up getting the wrong kind of kids to raise.


Carey Mulligan Will Be In A Bisaya Short Film

Image from Popsugar.com

I watched Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps alone. Actually, not quite. I was with Carey Mulligan, which pretty much sums up the very of my emotional universe right now. Curse you, Shia LaBeouf and your stupid surname. Who has that name?

There were scenes in the movie that made me laugh. Oliver Stone's attempt to do like some sort of modern feel filmmaking effect (probably seeing too much Aronofsky films and thinking hey I might not be too old to make something this cool ---bsshkk---cut clip, focus eyelid, zoom in to a pupil, change still, fast forward, binary nos. running down the screen because if there's one true modern movie effect to best represent the meltdown it's The Matrix from the noughties. Classic and REALLY authentic, Oliver. Or should I say, that's really OLIVER, what you did haha it's crap, Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps) makes me sad but I have to admit are a bit happy too. That scene where a splash of ocean waves was for half-a-second shown? That made the guy seats away from me appear to feel left out; probably also because I chortled in a way you can only do when watching such a clearly attention-worthy not-such-a-waste-of-my-dead-life Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps movie. The ooze-coming-out-of-my-nostrils-kind. And he of course has seen this because hey it's not like it's all too dark in the movies. Also, this was the guy who I was pretty sure just half-pretended to get shocked in a scene of the movie to show his interest and wit that he really got it. I didn't get most of the dialogue and it's OBVIOUSLY just because of Tinnitus because it's not like I'm dumb or anything like that (Is Papua Guinea not a continent?). Every time I got bored though I just imagine an executive in the very austere meeting nose-exploring in just as austere manner. Now that's entertainment copyrights German Moreno.

Of course everybody knows it's just about Carey Mulligan, the reason I was there. What else could there be? Did you just see that smile? That movement of the eyelids? Oh my god. Now I have to look what taut means and use it in everyday conversations in coffee shops, which will go look something like this,

"And may I have your name, sir?"
"Can you make it taut, please?."

Those who like the last Indiana Jones drivel might like Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps, so call your dad, who adopted you now.



A shoe-repair shop selling bottles of toilet bowl cleaners. Beside it a bakery. Students coming out of a building, a seen transom. A cafe where cubicles of TV monitors are connected online; the second story is an ear and nose and throat clinic. A walk in an unpaved road and in one of the aisles children are seen eating soya porridge with an old lady. You look up and the mountains have wire posts that parallel the vague slopes. There's no light sometimes and the water runs from a deep well so it isn't sometimes safe to drink.

Everybody here's walking.

On my left are two girls watching on Youtube a video of two boys soaked in mud and french-kissing in a bathroom. By the looks of the angle the camera couldn't have been set on a table, so they were probably more than two inside. On my right a boy I met and dismissed as nothing short of a retard in college years ago is playing Grand Theft Auto, murmuring lines to himself that I couldn't consider normal, with kids behind him, talking older than their age. Everybody here's getting by.

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These past days have been confusing me like hell and I've all the reasons to say it's probably not just because of the elections spectacle that wake me up to my more suffering. It's all this intentional disregard for everything worthy of being made fun of through irony that's not making it better. For example, the line "it's not like we're going there and working our ass out just for the money" is undervalued to have no meaning more than what it directly is. What about reading it as actually just going there for the money? Haven't people thought about that?

A few hours before I wrote this I bought french fries from a kiosk in a mall. I asked for some tissue paper and the store manager, or should I say, cashier said they didn't have any. So I said, "Oh, thanks. Eating this would REALLY make my hands clean.

I'm not sure I'm not entirely being a troll.

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