This Is NOT A Movie Review of Blue Room + The Enemy + Everyone Is Broken + Christ Operating System
DIVINE JUSTICE.
Everyone is guilty. Everyone is innocent. Only The Divine knows Who. ++
Psalms 96:13
Let all creation rejoice before the LORD, for he comes, he comes to judge the earth. He will judge the world in righteousness and the peoples in his faithfulness.
James 4:12
There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?
Matthew 25:31-46 tells us Jesus (as the Son of Man) will be the judge. Verse 33 says, “And He will place the sheep on his right, but the goats on the left.” Whatever the case, Jesus is our judge. It behooves us to be in the Word, abide in Christ, and walk by the Spirit.
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Too much liberal and the jump is too high and it's death. Too much conservative and we can't adapt so we get obsolete.80% traditional, 20% liberal.
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_________but isnt there false memories too? how can you be certain that memory is really accurate? studies were done on this... so maybe x happened in d past, but maybe i remembered it wrong? i repeat this all the time..
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and one of the things i think i trained myself doing that is still truthful but not too much is... i now reframe things.. i now say, maybe they are phonies in one way, but maybe they are not phonies in other ways.. i think theres a buddhist practice for this.. make all things a maybe.. maybe x is corrupt, but maybe on Sundays x is not corrupt.
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see what i mean? it is less rigid, it is still truthful, but more flowy, feels better.. but i dont think it is a lie.. how can i know if x is 100% phony when im not spending time with x 24/7 all his life? i only have fragments.
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maybe you do this too as baby steps? i dont know.. just winging this..
----------------like there is a joy in just not labelling something as true or not.. just being presence.. turn off the constant labelling.. and just feel the presence of now
i remember saying like that before..
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that i didnt know how people could live with travelling to places, enjoying life, when theres so much poverty and homelessness going on..
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i literally wanted to kill myself because i felt a hypocrite for doing things.. it felt like i was in a trap
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Ecclesiastes 12:14
For God will bring every deed into judgment, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil.
Matthew 12:36
But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken.
all phonies.. everyone is a phony.. NPAs are phonies, they just want to gain power for money.. families are phonies.. theyre just selling their kids... government is phony.. artists and novelists are phonies, cant live to theirvalues.. they preach x and then they do y..
since 5 out of 5 of my previous relationships really ended with depression and bad favors from the universe..and then i traced back to my lola..she didnt have depression and she didnt have hookups.. so i suspect this modern hookup culture caused all this anomalies.. natural selection intends us to marry forever one person except if they died, to get the reward. otherwise, we wont get the full reward, hence we keep getting depressed. many of the depressed and in misery in my family are in multiple partners, no marriage situation. so maybe theres wisdom there? a message from The Source how relationships should be done to not be result into a partnership without love?
lets do baby steps..huhu i wish i was a good psychologist to know how and where to start.. i only know what worked for me . but youre convinced it wont work for you... plus i have meds . maybe thats why i can cope and easily become positive.
like right now where my sleep is 100% ok, i feel so 2000x happy and content!! so full of life!! 10% misery only comes when sleep is damaged.. so i just solve the sleep.. in ur case, even with Good sleep, u feel misery... hmmmm
like that stutz thing.. i feel so much love i feel like im radiating love to everyone right now . thats why i have energy to talk to u cuz im like drowning soaked in Love
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i pray you can try 3 chapters...baby steps...do it for ur kids..if you get too depressed..all ur vanguard stocks will be for nothing..regarding ur gf, let the thots go.. back to the now.. all in the mind, past and future are just memories now. it is madness to keep on sticking to time that doesnt make us feel better. thats where the madness is. u sort of have automine disorder in the mind since it's eating you up
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this one is shorter: https://youtu.be/ONUjdUDFi1I?si=axq-4BQIxVuo0Kxh
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only at that one time..not the entire time like from day 1 of their life to day now..but also that happened 10-15 seconds+ ago..so maybe you interpeeted it wrong.. all in the past, can be blurred by false memory... theres an attachment to time too much, that i think eckhart tolle says is where the dysfunctions and madness come feom
All negativity is caused by an accumulation of psychological time and denial of the present.
You may find it hard to recognize that time is the cause of your suffering or your problems. You believe that they are caused by specific situations in your life, and seen from a conventional viewpoint, this is true. But until you have dealt with the basic problem-making dysfunction of the mind -- its attachment to past and future and denial of the Now -- problems are actually interchangeable. - tolle
u sentplay a game.. imagine you have no past and no future...just wipe it out.. just feel the now.. the tv, the air, the remote control..dont you feel a bit better? theres no actual problem in the now..
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only when we attach a past story in our mind does the pain start..
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If all your problems or perceived causes of suffering or unhappiness were miraculously removed for you today, but you had not become more present, more conscious, you'd soon find yourself with a similar set of problems or causes of suffering, like a shadow that follows you wherever you go. Ultimately, there's only one problem: the time-bound mind itself.
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power of now eckhart tolle really changed my life 60%.. but wasnt enuf.. when Jesus system came, i got the remaining 40%. Now im super confident i can cope with anything and im happy always. no more misery. no storylines looping in my brain.. all just spirit and a flowing energy radiating. i am now the space where everything happens.. formless, no labels except for practical reasons, like name of persons, kitchen, time of d day.. but no psychological time..just practical time
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i know you trust me if i say this guy worked for me.. so i hope youll give it a chance that it will work for you too.. maybe less on the negative media and movies that cause you more negativity? and we go more to life-giving stuff like this? https://youtu.be/EEsFmLv_izA?si=NtwUI_gVAE_7LBsL
me being left by mom.. me having a sold brother.. i filed them under maybe.. maybe that wasnt really my brother, got exchanged at hospital... or they lied like double agents.. so whats the point? i can never 100% prove it, might as well file it as false memory.. and i go back to now.. no more backstory, just the Now!
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the breathing, flowing, constant Now!
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in my case, i considered all my intellectual ideas before as trash, since those "intellect" woodyallen philosophy pretentious ideas probably what caused my depression . so theyre toxic junk, i threw out.. i dug up what the ancient people did, what my lolo and lola fed their minds, so they reached their age..so they survived long
it is a sickness to always be feeling in misery, not what the stoics would consider to be our highest state..so youre in a mental loop right now that doesnt lead to life.. drowning in what i remember to be a hell, 10 yrs ago.. get out of the fire fast! learn the old ways, how they survived stuff like you are going through, and dont trust ideas thats less than 100 yrs old, theyre mostly b. s., not tested by time. we need grandmother wisdom. or else we're wiped off the genepool.
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i already have my answer. evolution's definition of "smartness" vs man made.. synthetic vs natural.
camus, david foster wallace, sylvia plath, hemingway.. all died early from vices
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but theres te rhea right?and theres no commitment to marry..conservative needs 10% liberal ideas injected slowly to adapt to new times, but liberal ideas need also 80% conservativ ideas to avoid jumping too high fast, to make decisions with hidden risks..so im really pro marriage for this reason, for natural selection purposes..i have a hunch things will improve if people just married..and unhappy marriages are just isolated cases, marriage is still stable for the majority... i dont know why, just a hunch that the universe favors it and rewards people who stick to one by lowering our depression levels
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also, mmm this is a triggering issue tim... but i feel like this multiple girls situation tim has red flags..not cuz it is wrong, but only because it is too liberal, the happiest people i know only had 1 and married to them forever..so i believe sticking to one is favored by natural selection cuz i never know anyone who has this liberal arrangement that ended up well..but muslims did it so i dont really know.. i just have a bad feeling that natural selection might not favor it, might add to causing the depression.. like do you know of any person in ur family that u consider happy that has the same setup? but i just didnt want to comment more because it might be too personal..
____so step 1: eat up baby bits of tolle..Next, eat less junk, that affects your mood and perception too. I tend to be more negative when i ate too much junk.. Also, in my research, 99% of the elders i asked said to pray to God... so even if i thot praying was high grade dumb and stupid, i prayed anyway since it is my ideas that are dumb and stupid since im the one sick and depressed. malen and all the people i consider happy in the family all prayed, so clearly they were in the right. i didnt care if it was a lie or not.. i just wanted to feel like them . and it worked thanked God.. not saying u shud pray.. im saying u shud consider the old ways
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thats what i like about republican conservative ideas.. too much liberalism got us to this depession madness since we always try new ways, not tested by time..theres a reason things are to be conservative! because it avoids hidden risks like depression
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so my point is, maybe you should consider ideas that you at first dont believe in, give it a try, especially if theyre from old people who survived. unless you dont want to survive long like them. our choice. i made my choice to be better and thank God it paid off. Im here to help you be here too, the best i can.
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another thing i followed from my lola's survival strategy. she never felt depressed . so i tracked her ways.. turns out she was always in a close knit community with the poor, shared poor with her tenants at an urban poor housing.. once a wk.. so i did that too.. she never had netflix, so im cutting that down too.. i try.. she also ate so many veggies! truckloads since they were poor
life-giving friendships and community, which i found in church..some go to alcoholics anonymous, which i dont think we have here
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i wish u cud work out the energy to get the interest.. or else you will perish because you have your mind eating you alive.. i was like that before.. i was a slave to My truth and suffered for it.. i cudnt seem to be able to set free from my truth.. like a bird in a cage who enjoyed its cage
yes.. i can understand.. the devil who planted molesters and corrupt church pastors in church caused people not to trust.. but because i was desperate to feel better and malen was still a good example of jesus follower, i gambled.
i understand.. but I just wish you could feel this freedom from my mind, from the entrapment of my "definitions of truth" that made me want to kill myself, the lies of the devil. I was enslaved by my mind, because i paid too much premium to "truth", like i rather kill myself than to blur my definition of truth. like this misery-causing definition of "truth" became my God
true..because everyone is broken..that's the trick here..how to use our Universe-given skills to deal with all these bad scripts
if this wk, i consumed my 10 hrs max for church, then i cant spend time that week for friends or family. so to balance that, i spend my 10 hrs free to a friend next wk, and skip church activities
cuz right now, the principles/protocols I follow from our Church Therapy really helps! Like when I talk to my Accountability Brother, and he advises me of a principle to follow from Church tested by time, i immediately notice improvement within 24 hrs! thats why i want you to join your buddhist community to feel less pain and suffering, cuz that's gonna activate the cancer cells.
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you remind me of The Master by paul thomas anderson..you're going rogue..a little of buddhist..a little existentialist..figuring out The Way
there's a Christian counterpart for that.. Different O.S. like android vs apple ios
everyone's just fighting their own battles and have so little to give for others, and that's the hard work needed on our part. we can find new friends and yet it will still be the same. maybe the hope is in the mindsetting. changing our operating system..go to philosophy, read on ancient text, faith practices, etc...
i even feel bad about that with my mom.. thats why we are trained in church therapy to really drill into our heads that Only God will make me a top priority.. not people..people are broken.. even my mom probably is caring to me cuz she needs the money from u
which is join a buddhist community maybe to help you with taming the thots? becauase u cant go to a psychatriast since you say it is expensive..there are free NGOs though.. ..also i want to invite you to our community or to our elder pastor to minister to you, so you have 2nd opinion, but i know ur also not interestedthose are not lies.. you are indeed chosen.. she cudve chosen different man, regardless if it is for money or not.. just stop the labelling where it doesnt help.. the brain doesnt know the difference
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ur sabotaging urself.. not darwinian.. usually thats the irony about the smartest ones.. they die early by being too depressed to survive earth.. i thought smartness was to survive longest?
anandamarga community.. church community like ur mom.. look at ur mom, she is not perfect but isnt she well adjusted? she doesnt seem to have these negative thots too much, no?
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or else we die and will be in torment, unbearable pain..it will be walking hell..right now i am 10000% sure that there's a way out, to not feel the hell i did before
ok, would you rather be 10000% super a. i. accurate in truth but living in emotional misery? or just be 60% truth but the rest of 40% is just no-label, formless, just playful spirit, but you feel 60x better in happy levels? you are overdosed in truth perhaps? even gold melts and wont stabilize if it is too pure. roman colliseum collonades need to be intentionally bent to look straight, since absolute straight will make it look curved, an optical illusion thing.. like chinese wisdom of a river too pure is without fish..
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i even add random noise to my video edits to make them clean cuts.. i read it is a property of the universe to not make things too pure in order to survive
You replied to Timm
lets do baby steps..huhu i wish i was a good psychologist to know how and where to start.. i only know what worked for me . but youre convinced it wont work for you... plus i have meds . maybe thats why i can cope and easily become positive.
theres still shorts in youtube and reels in fb though, so that we shud also avoid. and yes... hmm.. maybe for natural selection survival reasons, we can work together with the ultra negative? cuz ur gonna blow up if thats not tempered! we need to do the actual work! like strength training huhu
yeah that too....i still dont know most parts, but yeah, i feel i get that part 60%...very long to explain...im still figuring thogh..it is a journey..like in buddhist, many will probably not achieve christlike perfection in this lifetime..reading cs lewis and aquinas for this, and other scholar stuff to get it more.. and praying i will grow in understanding
Kinda same issue in our operating system.. we can achieve Christlike perfection with the help of Grace, not by our own efforts to achieve perfection, but by God's grace, so all we have to do is do our best to follow His commands and keep on asking. And yes, we are also encouraged to isolate from desires. So the reason there are so many broken christians right now, is we dont isolate ourselves from the desires and broken human activities. So God doesnt grant the blessing of enlightenment.
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We christians are told to "not be of this world". so i can see why there are christian monks
also about good and bad karma tim, u believe in that? how does that work? is buddhism encouraging to stop doing what might
cause the bad karma pains, to lessen the suffering? or pain is still there regardless if we stop the "bad" stuff? maybe that helps..auditing yourself to remove spiritual malware
tim.. u will die doing that! please consult a professional, how will u enjoy the stocks you saved in vanguard when you will self harm early in your life? please invest in a professional like stutz to help you process...
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u will experience anxiety attack with that.. like me.. so i went to a professional with malen.. psychiatrist.. ryan and malen's best friend joy
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a dr. who knew a psychiatris
oh my..your words remind me of my college years..the stubbornness of the truth, like i had truths that are very hard to change! ..the job of the professional here is to make you feel another truth, the truth that she does love you...and to make this truth really100x register as true in your braund, to make you feel true and not feel like a lie
and maybe it is time to be a good buddhist now? to follow what was time-tested to work, not go on rogue? cuz what ur feeling right now is definitely not what i think a buddhist that had it figured out would feel, yes? i feel suffering and misery and just malady..i mean, yes, theres still suffering in buddhism, but it is bearable and can be carried with joy.. not with what you have, right?
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maybe find a mentor you can trust whose life you see to be worth emulating? not really perfect, but not in misery too much. in my case, it was my sister. i wanted to feel less pain as she did. in your case, i guess it is your mom. Your mom seems well adjusted, yes? maybe time to follow what worked for her? or what worked for the buddhists in anandamarga?
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we need an obi wan kenobi to help us away from dark side?
i understand.. but I just wish you could feel this freedom from my mind, from the entrapment of my "definitions of truth" that made me want to kill myself, the lies of the devil. I was enslaved by my mind, because i paid too much premium to "truth", like i rather kill myself than to blur my definition of truth. like this misery-causing definition of "truth" became my God
You replied to Timm
yeah but surely there are practices that you guys follow.. i dont think it is meant to be just doing it alone?
hmmm i dont know.., i dont think so.. i mean, christians do that, but i dont think theyre really following the source code
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so what youre really seeing from catholics and christians are i think the broken ones, those still trying to be christlike.
u always negativ tim huhu..it's gonna be bad for u tim..just worried
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i mean, ur very truthful but thats gonna take a toll on u..like u always see the negative..i hope we can tune ur brain up to not be too rigid with truths.. the ultra truthful novelists and artists i know went so deep that they unalived themselves because the darkness swallowed them..
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i mean surely theres good and bad in one thing right? maybe the trick is we train the brain to see the good and bad? like that novel, how to be both.. a zafra favorite?
closest analogy is: when i fly a kite, i can try to make it fly, by doing all the rules. But if it suddenly rains or no wind, no matter how hard I try to want to fly it, it never will. So Im just dependent on whether nature gives me wind. And believe next day there will be wind.
or overthinkingness
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i file "too smart" now under the same category as inhaling cocaine or smoking..dysfunctions that can make x exit the gene pool early.. so if we are really scientific and a man of science, we gotta change things
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to be scientific is to favor evolution
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like what buffet says when trading, if you want to make money, survive first..rationality is about survival.
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applies to life too.. dont smoke, dont eat junk, dont do drugs, dont be mean to people and to self, pray, meditate, believe in faith that lasted thousands of years, avoid too much ew ideas, try to be traditional often..these are evolutionary tools given to increase odds of survival..
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evolution revealed this to us to already! we just dont follow!!
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dont have multiple partners.. or else evolution punishes with STDs..dont have homo sex because evolution already shows She will give AIDS..and being murdered by jealous lover.. dont smoke.. or else cancer.. our job like caveman is to dig up what can increase our chances of our genetic code being transferred to next generation
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i already made that grave mistake.. i was an overthinker and abuser of music, and now evolution lowered my chances by 25% since i now have tinnitus that affects sleep and take meds as crutches that damages liver.. Nature gets rid of weak proteins like humans, survival of the fittest. So we need to learn to be fit and understand nature's systems.
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i now compiled a study of what people did to increase their odds, and theyre people who survived longest or had so many of their genetic code being passed to numerous generations.. then i try my best to follow what they did.. even if i cant
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whether we like it or not, Universe or Nature or Evolution is everyone's God . we are under Its rules, It will favor us and bless us with good stuff if we obey its rules.. or it will also punish us
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But evolution also gives us grace and mercy, where even if we did wrong, we wont immediately get diabetes or terminal illness..Nature gives us plenty of chances
ah true.
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hmmm.
my bet is for you to go to an elder. can you talk to my pastor? he can advise without christian stuff.
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In addition to open communication, maybe it's important to set clear boundaries and expectations? like Make sure both of you are on the same page regarding the nature of your relationship. Also, take some time for self-reflection. Are there aspects of the relationship that you might be overlooking due to your feelings? If you feel that your concerns about being used for money persist, it's essential to prioritize your own well-being and make decisions that are in your best interes... healthy relationship be built on trust, respect, and mutual care. If the dynamics don't improve, you might need to consider whether this relationship is truly fulfilling for both of you. give it time limit maybe?
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or maybe after 3 months and they wont agree with terms and they dont satisfy, time to leave both? and start fresh.. this time, start clean with conservative ideas, clear terms? no intimacy before knowing and accepting each other full?
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and just make right with kids obligations?
so now before i enter a relationship, i dig up first what nature and evolution's rules are to get its favor and increase my odds this girlfriend wont suck and it ends in misery.. nature's default settings is joy and abundance, like it even creates healing of wounds and trees grow and create fruits..She cudve designed it to just burn in flames. cuz nature roots for us, wants us to follow Her good system. It's Evolution's nature to give us the best shot, but only if we obey its protocols.
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if we deviate, she injects pain and suffering. first, to straighten us towards healing. second, to death, as a form of love since She doesnt want us to suffer no more. she will rearrange our atoms to create better version. we go back to fungi
