The Solution To Cebuano Problems:Jeffrey Jeturian's EKSTRA

1. Stories that remind me of Jeffrey Jeturian's Ekstra, a moving movie-in-a-movie ni Ate Vi: The Great Gatsby, because it's a story of how far human will and tolerance to shame can go; David Foster Wallace' Infinite Jest because Ekstra is about obsession and hope anchored on entertainment of the most shameful form; the whole 30ROCK TV show because of the plot's blurring of lines and its "extras/stars of extras/stars" angle where what is left is a liberating statement of people's fascinating equalizer: TV; the Wikipedia entry on the word META; the Su Tong's Wives and Concubines movie because of Loida's tasteful room and decor composition; the THE BELIEVER essay about David Foster Wallace's beef against self-consciousness and irony as a protection against ridicule; Ricky Gervais' Extras; and that Family Guy Star Wars parody where storm troopers got wasted as the Space War/Contrived Space Drama went on, in which case I am reminded of my simple complaint: who's to say that the street children in Colon are not method actors? 

2. Solutions I got from the Vilma Santos' EKSTRA to the problems Cebuanos have over the recent Pork Barrel Corruption, the casualties of the Shipping Lines epic tragedy and the death of the professor in University of Cebu:

• 2.SYRUP: Shame is what happens when you underestimate the power of the uncertain. So the next time you tell your friends you're the star of a film, make sure the film is not a piece of garbage that your rich friends are producing to seed your bucket list. Story's moral: don't believe too much about the alleged corruption because does it matter really? When you have faith that the money being stolen could easily go to the production of beautiful parks and movies and books that everybody can illegally download for "free", what's there to complain? 

• 2.APPLE: There doesn't seem to be a whiff of envy from the extras and that hit me: to be happy, try not comparing yourself, even from yourself. Take it all in a moment and let go, or at least that's the garbage collector's t-shirt told me last week. In life, all you need is food, a self-defined hope and some unfortunate event you can propel your daily grind from. Envy's never part of it, the way Piolo Pascual should have never been part of Ekstra because she's too talented in portraying a talentless actor. #NoThat'sActuallyShe

• 2.MARIAN: There's a scene in the movie where Marian Rivera took off her lapel to share to another actress because the production budget is like the nature of PINOY soap opera: cringe-inducing and poor. She's awkward to look at, but graceful, and I am still in love with her. Interlude: after the movie I went to 7-eleven to seed my Eleven Rewards and at the counter the teller sees my Marian Rivera photo on my wallet and says, "Oy naa lagi kay picture nako. Char." Lesson learned: you are not Marian Rivera, but you can pretend to be, the same way the University of Cebu professor could theoretically be said to be dead when in fact he might be fully alive somewhere above or below you, living his idea, leaving traces of a spent life Jason Bourne style.

3.  Moments in EKSTRA where I shed a tear that no one wiped dry, and screamed my laugh: 

• 3.Laugh: the bit player doing the Guilt Trap routine before selling her audience candies and bottled water, in which case she has a bipolar persona of a day-time-hack and a night-time-underpaid artist, but in this case, her hack-job is the underpaid acting that most supposedly serious artists consider sublime because the act is done only for the art, and her version of a real artist's work is to sell bottled water in between shoots. This reversal has fascinated me since I saw Leos Carax' Holy Motors, and should be discussed. Between dates. Between you and me, Marian Rivera.

• 3.CRIED: the bit player Loida being ridiculed to the slow background intro of what I think is a Jerrold Tarog piece (Sana Dati please come to me) and being frightened by the tuition fee request text from her daughter. Lesson learned: if you don't have kids, there's less stress for you should there be another boat tragedy your kids would have been sure casualties of.