How Not To Burn Trisikad Drivers To Their Death

An Article That Might Have Appeared in SunStar:


How Not To Burn Trisikad Drivers To Their Death



by Richard Joseph Tandoc Abad

Here's a joke: a waitress in a Pizza bistro asked a guy, "What's your order, sir?" and the guy, with his suave looks and cebuano wit, answered: bipolar dis. Replace the guy with me and you have the guy who threw away his tablet phone to its half-death because most likely of his Manila Med-diagnosed Bipolar 2 Disorder. But this is not about the self-indulgence of being such an ill because the disease, as my bestest friend put it, might just be a way to be "patagad, gara, papansin, inO.A.". It feels great to be so lucky to have such a best friend who believes I might have just been making up an illness to make myself more, uhm, interesting, maybe, is this the right term, Port? This Crossline Piece is about a trisikad driver who, while driving his bicycle with sidecar, was simultaneously holding an umbrella to defer shade to a little girl riding behind him, all sweating, and gloriously insanely poetic in such settlement of a view. All you need to learn about Albert Camus's "chaos of image" is in this image of a Trisikad Driver and that, in this absurd world, should be something you a privileged man should at least meditate about.



But this is not about meditation, or how you can join me with my Yoga troop in Cho Un Temple every Tuesday and Thursday for a Yoga session a J.D. Salinger fan who digs the work of D.T. Suzuki would totally be so dope about. This isn't even about how a tricycle driver can get you to eat Tuslob Buwa in Cebu and how it can change a summer of a person who thinks "to be stupid is to be alive" and how Tuslob Buwa should be a diet of a Napoles because all week all month of Tuslob Buwa is a deserved diet for someone who hoards the money of the mass. This is about a question qua the issue of tricycle drivers in Cordova, the question being: how much do we have to ignore them and how many drivers do we need to offer as a burning man to the Sun god because isn't their driving in the middle of the scorching 2pm Cebu Global-Climate-vitaminized screaming sun a form of living sacrifice, not unlike a crucifixion - before we realize that hey, they need our help, these people are human beings, and are like, to your great surpise, you, a person who breathes and likes Tuslob Buwa, too.

So the problem: at P10 a ride, how can we help them not waste their life to the knife of the sun and maximize their energy every 2pmtrip?

Solution: Google the How-To-Tutorial in installing a bicycle/dynamo-powered Battery Pack in the Trisikad and Build a "Battery Storage Extracted From The Trisikad Driver's Bicycle Force" so for every time they travel from Lantaw to Alegria Palms, they get to store their burnt body fuel to actual battery fuel stored in the Trisikad's attached Battery Pack that you, a man of great valuation of priorities, uses to charge your 2nd iPhone that you never get to use because you're too cool and too Hyper-Cebu-Hipster to answer the text message of a Unipolar-depressed friend crying out for help.

So as a conclusion for this piece, here's a hashtag you can't untag: #Calling The Sitoy Politicians in Cordova known for their "Non-Corrupt Reputation because The Sitoy House By The Street in Alegria is so "Karaan, Klarong Wa Nangurakot" " : Will you help this make happen? I will hashtag be very thankful if you do because I'm so selfish that I satisfy myself through helping Trisikad drivers that I don't know or that I'm very afraid to poison me, because you know what they say about people in Cordova, right? 

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