7 Things That Come To Mind After Watching The Taking of Deborah Logan
1. Wow, I still don't have a job and who's going to pay for my medical bills when I start losing my mind like this Deborah Logan lady? She's badass, though. She's old and still fighting evil. OR IS EVIL.
I wonder what my Lola Towing of The Lola Towing Show would think of this movie? I bet she and Logan would be cool friends and lovers, because you know Logan is Wolverine and he doesn't age?
2. I definitely need a job to be happy. But I'm going to die anyway, and heaven is not real, what's the point?
3. Heaven is real, heaven is real. Ohmagad, I sound like Franny of J.D. Salinger's Franny and Zooey because I chant words to convince myself with a lie.
3. I just sold a Panty Rose. It's a plastic rose but coiled at the center of the petals is a pair of hot red lace panties. And I just lost to a letter-writing contest judged by Judge Simeon Dumdum. I don't trust that judge. He's very JUDGEmental. Haha, get it? Judges judge, so I'm offending no one haha I'm joking please don't sue me.
I wonder what Simeon Dumdum would say about Deborah Logan? Or about this movie that we thought was directed by Bryan Singer?
4. I don't like it as a whole but it has impressive editing and photography, so it's okay.
5. Watch it if you really really enjoy gore and suffering and torture and cancer and snakes and devils and kidnapped children.
6. The movie is an okay fun because how are you supposed to enjoy watching a woman on the brink of Alzheimer's?
7. The daughter of Deborah Logan is like a Rene Zelweggerized Joan Cusack.
